age appropriate gifts for xmas

One of the things that absolutely drove me out of my mind this Xmas was the fact that my parents felt the need to buy my son toys that included small parts - parts too small for a three-year-old. Hello! It says right there on the box that it is for "AGES 6 AND UP", so why are you buying it for my son? Am I supposed to put it away for three years and then give it to him?

The worst part about it is that I have no idea what they are giving him until he has already unwrapped the present, and then I see the age disclaimer, and by that time it is too late and my son is ecstatic about opening the gift and getting it out. So I get to be the "bad guy" and take it away, explaining to my son that he's not old enough to play with it.

The truth is that most of the toys out there still have small parts, even if they say that they are okay for children who are my son's age. And to be honest he is finally getting past that "stick everything in my mouth" toddler phase. But the last thing I need is for him to choke to death on plastic GiJoe missiles, or miniature car spoilers from some Hot Wheels collectible. Heck, even the wheels could fall off and end up in his mouth.

One of the gifts that he received was this GiJoe transport vehicle. I remember GiJoe vehicles - I had many as a kid. And every one of them had to be assembled and came apart easily. In fact, my father used to scream at me all the time for leaving chunks of GiJoe parts in the filter of our swimming pool. You would think that he'd remember all of that hollering at me, and how the GiJoe vehicles would break apart into a zillion pieces, specifically in the course of a "battle" with the evil Cobra.

Then again, maybe this is my father getting back at me. He wants me to have to sit there for two hours trying to assemble these things for my son, and then follow him around the house all day long picking up the pieces. Hmmm....

xmas is for kids, or at least it should be

At least that is what I'm trying to convince our relatives. I'm sick and tired of receiving and giving unappreciated gifts. How many times do I have to advise my parents not to buy me clothing because they don't know my style? Plus, now that we live in a small town, I will have to drive a good hour if I plan on trying to return or exchange any of the gifts that I receive.

So we've spread the word that adults are off of our Christmas list this year. Feel free to get the kids some new toys, but please keep your money and send me a well written card instead. Or better yet, get the kids some clothing instead. We've got enough toys around the house.

Now I know that certain individuals thrive on shopping during the holidays and they have this belief that they have the power to find the perfect gift for everyone, but they're wrong. Even if you feel you know someone well, you'd be hard pressed to find them the *perfect* gift unless they actually tell you ahead of time. Heck, I've been married for over ten years now, and I still don't know what would make the perfect gift for my wife.

Sorry for such a humbug post, but the holidays are on my nerves this year, and ever since we quit watching television, I'm able to see this holiday for what it is - an excuse to bolster the economy. And no, going to church once a year at Christmas doesn't mean that you remember what Christmas is all about.